Wedding Wednesdays: Michelle + Johnathon Stone

When Marketing Coordinator Michelle Stone met her future husband on a dating app, she wasn’t very familiar with the military lifestyle. No one close to her had ever been in the military, so she had lots to learn.

After the couple eloped, Michelle dove right in making connections and finding support. In six short years, her experience as an army spouse has taken her from active duty to reserves, dealing with disability, and reintegrating into civilian life again.

Learn about Michelle’s beautifully blended family and how she came to be an empowered military spouse now leading others on the MSAN staff team!

Share your engagement story!

He messaged my dad asking for his permission as he was going to surprise me with a weekend getaway. My dad didn't know it was a surprise so immediately texted me to tell me.

My now-husband was not happy at all and was ready to call all his plans off as it was ruined. It took me convincing him to continue with the surprise weekend. He wanted to wait longer so then I could officially be surprised but he was getting ready to deploy and so we decided to just go ahead and get married during his weekend getaway he planned.

Tell us about your wedding.

We got married at the courthouse, just across state lines into Texas as you did not need witnesses there. We made it all about us where we did not tell anyone what we were doing that weekend and just took off. There isn't much you can control within the military so being able to have a whole weekend to ourselves was absolutely perfect. We had a photoshoot prior and then stayed in a suite at the casino and just enjoyed the time together before telling everyone once we got home.

How did you find support in the early years of being a military spouse?

I made friends within the local military Facebook groups. I joined a Monthly Gift Basket group for military spouses on that post and was able to make a good set of friends. I later joined the FRG and became more involved within the unit.

What were those first years like for you as a military spouse?

It was rough, especially since he was gone a lot the first years. We both had children from previous relationships so my son and I got thrown right in and had to navigate it alone for the most part.

Even though my husband had been in for 3 years, he was clueless how anything worked for the kids and myself, so it took me having to reach out to people and research to find out how to do very simple and common things. The majority of the time, I had more information with what was going on and what he needed to do to before he even did, because of the connections that I made.

Has your outlook on military lifestyle changed at all over the years? How so?

We have seen several different sides of the military lifestyle within our relationship. We started as an active duty family, reserves then now we are navigating my husband being 100% disabled (and still in reserves).

Being on the other side of things, it makes me realize how I did not live in the moment as much as I should of while he was active duty. We all miss being surrounded by the military community and are still trying to find out footing out in the civilian world.

Making friends was so much easier while he was active duty because you can sit next to someone at the hospital and easily strike up a conversation because they just get it. If your husband is deployed and your child throws a huge fit at the PX and your about to break down too, usually there is another parent right there willing to give you a helping hand, because they get it.

The community is absolutely amazing, if you open yourself up to it.

What advice would you give to a new military spouse that you wish you had when you were married?

The best advice I would give is to take it all in. Don't keep yourself locked up at home–get yourself out there, make friends, join things and take in every second you can.  

Don't listen to everyone when it comes to how horrible a location may be; explore it for yourself and find the beauty in the simple things. Explore all the historical locations, take tons of pictures and make memories.

Finding your group of friends is key to making any location feel like home. Never be scared to reach out, ask the silly questions and just learn.

If you are new to military life and would like to be connected with a mentor, click here.

If you are interested in becoming a mentor or volunteering with MSAN, please click here.

Stephanie Allen is the Communications & Marketing Director for the Military Spouse Advocacy Network. She is a proud Navy wife and mom, a writer, blogger, success coach, and the Content Manager & columnist for Tidewater Family Plus magazine.